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Sunday, June 28, 2015

Relationships, the Devil Made Me Do It, and Dreams

Relationships have always been challenging, but today they seem even more so. The divorce statistics show a breakdown of the traditional family, and the number of people on medication due to stressful relationships is frightening. Nowadays it is common to meet people who have three or more failed marriages, and some will acknowledge many more relationships that did not result in marriage.

When I was a young man, I would occasionally chat with an older man where I was employed who liked to tell stories about his life experiences. Once he confessed that he had some bad experiences with women in his life. He told me about a marriage that was not good and claimed the woman was the bane of his existence. I asked him why he married her, and he gave his favorite response: "the devil made me do it." Well, I’m not sure what he meant by devil, but I suspect he could find the answer within himself with a little searching.

So why is it so difficult for people to find happiness in a relationship? Are they just having bad luck, or is something more involved? I don’t pretend to be a sociologist; my understanding is based on observation. During my lifetime, I have heard few people say they sought help through prayer for confirmation before committing to an intimate relationship. 

I recall hearing even fewer people say that they looked to dreams for guidance before entering into a serious relationship. And those individuals I knew who did seek guidance through their dreams were involved in an Edgar Cayce study group, where dreams were discussed during a part of each meeting and daily recording and interpretation was encouraged.

No one has to enter into an intimate relationship wondering if he or she has done the right thing. If you seek guidance from your dreams, a great deal of grief can be avoided. Often if a relationship ends badly, there were signs along the way that not all was well, but the signs were ignored. Dreams will focus attention on the visible signs that were ignored, reminding the dreamer that the information is relevant and needs to be heeded.

Beyond the visible signs, there can be much more. On a subconscious level, a steady stream of telepathy between your minds could offer far greater insight, but would remain hidden unless you paid attention to your dreams. These communications may reflect deeper aspects of your individual characters and contain relevant information one or both of you was trying to hide. 

In an earlier post, I described a conversation I overheard between two young women. One woman thought she had met the perfect man and was planning to marry him, except for one “small” problem. The “small” problem was he didn’t like her children at all. Now, perhaps she thought he would come to like her kids in time, that it was an attitude on his part she could change.


I would love to see that woman’s dreams. If this relationship was doomed from the start, as it appeared to be, her dreams would make that clear, and almost certain grief could be avoided.

The above situation does not require dream guidance to realize there is a problem. To some extent, she did realize the problem. But her dreams could drive home a message in a forceful way, perhaps by showing her the consequences of her planned action. In this case, the problem was not hidden; the severity of it was just not recognized.

In other cases, one of the pair might be living a double life. If the dishonest one is clever, he or she may be able to conceal it from the partner’s conscious awareness. However, nothing is hidden from the subconscious. If the victim paid attention to his (her) dreams, he (she) would quickly discover that something is wrong. 

I cannot think of a better tool for discovering unseen intentions and actions and the true morality of the other person. In this situation, dreams can also provide a view of the consequences of actions, in this case entering into a relationship without accurate knowledge of the other person’s true character and intentions.

I have avoided pursuing relationships on several occasions because of warnings or advice from my dreams. One time, I was told we really didn’t have much in common. Another time, I was told the woman had some serious issues, which were not readily apparent to me at that time. Of course, for the guidance to be beneficial, it must be recognized and the appropriate action taken, sometimes a difficult thing to do. 

If someone is determined to push forward with a relationship, even though warnings have been seen in dreams, little can be done. One always has the option of ignoring a dream and its message; most people already do that.

If you really want to improve your relationships with friends, coworkers, and a partner, you should study your dreams and apply what you learn. If you are in a bad relationship, I think you will find that the devil did not make you enter into the relationship, unless by devil you mean your own desires. If you are in a good relationship, there is always room for greater understanding. 

I am not including family relationships such as with parents or children. There are special issues associated with them. One obvious one is that you do not choose these relationships as a conscious act in this life. You have to learn how to deal with the personalities that make up the family in which you find yourself.

In addition to heeding a warning in a specific situation, you may need to work on understanding the cause. If you have a string of disastrous relationships in your past, you need to understand why. This may take some real work and not be resolved by a single dream or two. By interpreting your dreams, you will begin to understand your choices and the reasons for them. This can be quite therapeutic, and would enhance the value of any time you spend with a therapist, who may ask you about your dreams. 

I am not providing any advice concerning health care, whether physical or mental. If you find yourself unable to cope, you should seek professional help. My posts are for relatively normal people who want to improve their lives. I think working with your dreams can help you avoid getting into a state that requires professional help, but if you are already there, by all means seek help. 

My goal is to make people aware of the potential of dreams. I try to do that by drawing on my own experience and many years of working with my dreams. My own life benefited greatly and I hope my commentary will help others realize similar or greater benefits.


If you already have a good relationship with a partner and friends, I think you can still benefit. You will find your dreams contain some surprises and room for growth.

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